Jona Keri assaults his wife

[DigitalRock]

What a dumpster fire of a thread.... Typical. Certified relationship experts and psychologists everywhere here.

[Jimcanuck]

I'd rather be judgmental than a habitual liar and narcissist, so there's that.

 

Glass houses, Jim.

 

Glass houses, eh. You are always the first to throw stones, boxy boy.

[Omar]

Yep "I got my masters without ever understanding anything from any of my professors/teachers my entire life" is 100% plausible.

If you come remotely close to a Masters (highly doubtful) you will soon realize independent study is key. It's not high school where teachers hold your hand.

[Carlos Danger]

lol wow

 

past the cringe and distastefulness, though, that's some serious irony. You assault everyone's eyes every time you fart out a post.

 

I am not a paid professional baseball writer. My posts are free, you get what you pay for. This chat board is my tertiary hobby. I am a niche poster that provides a degree of entertainment during a slow off season or a 100 loss season.

 

If you could reconsider your review on Yelp, I would be appreciative.

[Pendleton]

I am a niche poster that provides a degree of entertainment

 

[Carlos Danger]

My main stereotype is that deaf people can't hear and speak very poorly if at all. Hearing impaired people can hear very little. There is no chance a deaf guy is striking up a conversation at a bar with some hottie.

 

Are those stereotypes, or so you have a different definition, like "anyone who pretends they can't hear on the internet for victimhood points"

 

I suspect having a disability is somewhat of an in. If you are a regular guy and a girl doesn't want to be bothered in a bar, she probably tells you to f*** off or she is a “lesbian”. If you have a disability, she will probably talk to you if just to not come off looking like a total bitch in front of the whole bar.

 

I suspect it goes something like this in a loud bar: Hi, I am Jim. (Girl) What’s your name? (Jim) What? (Girl) I said what’s your name, I didn't hear you? (Jim) What did you say? I can’t hear you? (Girl) WHAT’s YOUR NAME!? (Jim) I literally can’t hear you, I am deaf. (Girl) Oh you poor thing.. We can text each other.

 

(Jim) Did you know that when one function of the body doesn’t work well, the body compensates and the other functions get stronger. (Girl) Really, I didn’t know that... (Jim) It is true, deaf people have better vision and smell for example then the average person. As a matter of fact, the compensation the body creates due to the loss off one function is not just limited to the senses. For example, my tongue is 25% longer and stronger than the average man. My stamina is near superhuman and my body compensated for my hearing loss by endowing me with a 12” cock.

 

(Girl) Check please! Your place or mine?

[Carlos Danger]

 

Like I said, I appeal to a niche. I should have clarified that the niche consists of people with a good sense of humor, great personalities, driven individuals and people not angry with the world.

 

Sorry, you are not my target audience. Bobtheforeskin might be able to provide what you are looking for.

[gruber92]

I was wondering why this thread would consist of nearly 100 posts until I read through it. Wow..

[Jimcanuck]

I suspect having a disability is somewhat of an in. If you are a regular guy and a girl doesn't want to be bothered in a bar, she probably tells you to f*** off or she is a “lesbian”. If you have a disability, she will probably talk to you if just to not come off looking like a total bitch in front of the whole bar.

 

I suspect it goes something like this in a loud bar: Hi, I am Jim. (Girl) What’s your name? (Jim) What? (Girl) I said what’s your name, I didn't hear you? (Jim) What did you say? I can’t hear you? (Girl) WHAT’s YOUR NAME!? (Jim) I literally can’t hear you, I am deaf. (Girl) Oh you poor thing.. We can text each other.

 

(Jim) Did you know that when one function of the body doesn’t work well, the body compensates and the other functions get stronger. (Girl) Really, I didn’t know that... (Jim) It is true, deaf people have better vision and smell for example then the average person. As a matter of fact, the compensation the body creates due to the loss off one function is not just limited to the senses. For example, my tongue is 25% longer and stronger than the average man. My stamina is near superhuman and my body compensated for my hearing loss by endowing me with a 12” cock.

 

(Girl) Check please! Your place or mine?

 

Nailed it.

[Spanky99]

lol

[AdamGreenwood]

That sucks balls. I have been as well, but only really noticed in retrospect 'cause I'm physically much bigger than every girl I've dated so it doesn't seem really bad 'cause it doesn't actually hurt that much, but it's pretty f***ed up to have a girlfriend repeatedly punch you and s***.

 

Maybe stop posting naked pictures of them online.

[Brownie19]

Yep "I got my masters without ever understanding anything from any of my professors/teachers my entire life" is 100% plausible.

 

I graduated from the Western engineering program also. Can confirm. Most professors were foreign and f***ing god awful at teaching. I rarely understood what they were talking about. I was good at memorizing things and copying my peers so I survived.

[Laika]

Yep "I got my masters without ever understanding anything from any of my professors/teachers my entire life" is 100% plausible.

 

Got my law degree while barely going to class AMA

[Boxcar]

Got my law degree while barely going to class AMA

 

Well it explains a lot

[Deadpool]

Maybe stop posting naked pictures of them online.

 

*shrug* maybe they should stop getting knocked up by other dudes then.

[Krylian]

*shrug* maybe they should stop getting knocked up by other dudes then.

 

Wait. What? Nudies? Where was I for this.

[Boxcar]

Wait. What? Nudies? Where was I for this.

 

Oh god, can we please not do this

[BTS]

Wait. What? Nudies? Where was I for this.

 

This was probably 10 years ago now

[Thaddeus Malice]

Got my law degree while barely going to class AMA

 

Isn't that how we all graduated law school?

[Krylian]

Oh god, can we please not do this

 

Relax. I don't need to see them. I have the internet. Just curious when this happened. Clearly it was before my time.

[Dr. Dinger]

I’m pretty sure Jimbo is in his 60s. Entirely possible that he was pulling 10s back in the 70s and 80s then settled down later in life to have his family. Hearing loss might be recent.

 

I believe him. Nobody would just lie on the internet about their sexual exploits.

 

More to the point, why would anyone lie about being deaf?

[Boxcar]

Relax. I don't need to see them. I have the internet. Just curious when this happened. Clearly it was before my time.

 

I think it's a part of BJMB history best forgotten

[Todd Van Anus]

I should have just posted the link to article I read this in.

 

https://deadspin.com/baseball-writer-jonah-keri-arrested-charged-with-assau-1836532809

So looks like they've been married a year now. Poor guy will have no income now as all three media outlets are suspending their ties with him. No income + no wife + no home = YIKES!

[Carlos Danger]

So looks like they've been married a year now. Poor guy will have no income now as all three media outlets are suspending their ties with him. No income + no wife + no home = YIKES!

 

Plus legal bills, and probably divorce bills.

[Todd Van Anus]

Plus legal bills, and probably divorce bills.

 

My God. Look at what one bad mistake can get you...ruin your life. I sure hope he is a mentally strong person. I'll just never see the benefit of getting married.

[BTS]

My God. Look at what one bad mistake can get you...ruin your life. I sure hope he is a mentally strong person. I'll just never see the benefit of getting married.

 

There's always the option of not beating your wife.

[Todd Van Anus]

There's always the option of not beating your wife.

 

lol that is not what I meant! I just meant regarding divorce bills...like why do two people need a contract to prove their love? To me a contract just lessens the romance of being in a relationship. And if either party ever wants out of the marriage (usually the wife) it'll cost you $50k, and more if there are kids involved.