Off-day: Baseball jokes (forgive me)

[Convo]

Just came across these instant classics (not srs)

 

#1

Girl – (Arriving late at game) “What’s the score, Larry?”

Boy– “Nothing to nothing.”

Girl–“Oh, goody! Then we haven’t missed a thing!”

 

#2

Bride– “Who is the man in the blue coat, darling?”

Groom– “That’s the umpire, dear.”

Bride– “Why does he wear that funny wire thing over his face?”

Groom– “To keep from biting the ball players, precious.”

 

#3

Ned– “Pop, what becomes of a ball player when his eye-sight begins to fail?”

Pop– “They make an umpire of him.”

Edited June 30, 2014 by Convo

[HERPDERP]

Posted this before:

 

Three fans are walking to Fenway Park for the Red Sox-Yankees playoff series, when they see a foot sticking out of some bushes. An inspection revealed a dead-drunk naked woman. One man placed his Orioles baseball cap on her right breast. The Red Sox fan placed his cap on her left breast, and the Yankee fan put his over her crotch. They then called the police.

 

The cop lifted up the Orioles cap, and made a few notes. He then lifted the Red Sox cap and made more notes. Then he lifted the Yankees cap, put it down, lifted it again and put it down. When he lifted it the third time the Yankee fan said, ''What are you doing? Are you some kind of pervert, or what?'' The cop said, I was just confused, usually when I see a Yankee cap, there's an a**hole under it.''

[G-Snarls]

MLB is deciding whether or not to reinstate Pete Rose for the 2015 season. When asked about it, Rose said, "I hope they do, cause I've got $50 riding on it."

[GD]

Lol, is that legit?

[wilko]

[Convo]

 

*Dead silence*

[Orgfiller]

Nearing the trade deadline, GM #1 calls GM #2:

 

GM #1: I'm looking to entertain offers for Bud Norris. Of course I want a deal that provides each side with equal value. I'm getting a bit frustrated though as I haven't received any fair proposals.

 

GM #2: What did you have in mind?

 

GM #1: It would have to be one of Boegarts, Webster, Bradley, or Cecchini to get in the conversation at this point.

[o2cui2i]

“If you don’t know where you’re going, you might end up some place else.”

 

Yogi

[o2cui2i]

because I catch it for last time round. is this thread in the right forum area? it's baseball and yet not.

[John_Havok]

Speaking for all people that have worked in restaurants serving halibut: If I could strangle you through the internet, I would.

 

I don't need a reason. I'd strangle him just for the halibut.

[walkoff93]

This is funny:

Radio Station asks a fan wearing a Pink Hat questions about the game they just saw.

 

http://boston.cbslocal.com/tag/ask-a-pink-hat/

[wilko]

I don't need a reason. I'd strangle him just for the halibut.

 

I don't like your tone young man.

[eastcoastjaysfan]

Didn't laugh at any of the jokes posted in this thread.

 

Just an FYI

[wilko]

Didn't laugh at any of the jokes posted in this thread.

 

Just an FYI

 

http://www.gifsforum.com/images/gif/i

[kgm1]

I like what AJ Pierzynski said to the Ump when he didn't get a call.

 

"" Give me a new Ball. One you can see this time. ""

[Orgfiller]

Didn't laugh at any of the jokes posted in this thread.

 

Just an FYI

Mine actually happened though.

[Convo]

Didn't laugh at any of the jokes posted in this thread.

 

Just an FYI

 

Mine weren't supposed to be funny, FYI.

[wilko]

Mine weren't supposed to be funny, FYI.

 

http://i.imgur.com/kVASZSk.gif

[GD]

That's very unnerving.