Howard Roark
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Everything posted by Howard Roark
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I want an 11-game losing streak. Or more, whatever, but at least 11. That would be hilarious.
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Troll Season 2013.
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No pain no gain, gentleman. Let it rain.
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Get ready to say goodbye to Sanchez, Stroman and Gose so that we can win 86 games next year instead of 83.
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Ack. Once was enough for me. I literally turned away from the monitor once I saw it, that's just some brutal s***. I mean, there are fractures, and then there's your foot snapping off from your leg, held together only by tendons and skin. This was of the latter variety.
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Ahhhhhhhh f***kkkkkkkkkkk. That hurt just watching it.
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Said without irony. And true. Dear god................
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Nice job laying off two straight breaking balls there Bautista, however I'm extremely disappointed that you don't seem to have some sort of patented celebration for such a feat.
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Oh, not to worry, that's just something daddies and mommies do when they love each other very much and have been following the Toronto Blue Jays for more than a few seasons.
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Name-calling? Good job. You sure showed me.
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Still you. You need to try harder to save your e-peen from shrinking a few inches on this one.
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That was literally the only answer you could have given me that would not make you look like a moronic douche in my eyes. f*** you. MOAR suffering! Let's go for the gusto! We're gonna suck with no farm anyhow, let's pile some big-name overpaid, unmoveable long-term contracts on top of it! Ohhhh f*** yeah, whip my balls while you do that too! f***kkkkkkkk I'm gonna cummmmm, pour some of that hot candle wax onto my dick!!!11!!!!11
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Actually, considering where this club is likely to be in 3 years' time, that DOES sound better. This isn't MLB 2kxx man, in 3 years Cano will be as unmoveable for this club as A-Roid is for the Bankees right now. Think please.
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So in 3 years when we're paying a precipitously declining 34 year-old 2B $25m+ a year for another 7 years on a rebuilding club how happy are you going to be? DO. NOT. WANT.
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Apparently we're contending in 2014? I know, doesn't make much sense to me either, but I guess that's why they get paid the big bucks. The Peter Principle explains all.
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Cano's best years are already behind him. I never understood overpaying someone for what they've done in years past when you goddamn know they're not going to play anywhere near as well for you, going forward. Albert Pujols and Josh Hamilton say hi. Oh, and about a kadjillion others I'm too lazy to name.
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Cano's looking to become the latest in an illustrious parade of all-stars who play their way into a ridiculous long-term huge-money deal only to begin seriously declining immediately thereafter.
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Yup. That's the hope, anyhow. I doubt it though, I think Beeston and AA are safe until the 2015 offseason with this country club franchise. Unless they REALLY s*** the bed, which is what I'm rooting for now. I mean, last night, the dugout was going INSANE with joy because they were up 8-3 at one point, hand-signs and juvenile 30-second handshakes up the f***ing wazoo. I guess they forgot they're in last place or something? Pathetic. I was beaming from ear to f***ing ear when they blew it. Those clowns got what they deserved.
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I suspect that it's just a defence mechanism shielding myself from the sheer violence of this years WTF-ishness, but at this point I'm enjoying watching these self-adulating clowns fall flat on their faces. I'm actively rooting for them to lose every game from here on out, let them feel just a taste of what we fans have been going through these past few months, ya know? I really detest the personality of this year's roster, they're just so very hard to root for. It brought me much satisfaction seeing them get raped last night after all their loviste-ing and bicep flexing and novelty-handshaking nonsense.
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Jose Canseco "Big announcement coming at 9 pm"
Howard Roark replied to Angrioter's topic in Toronto Blue Jays Talk
Ahhh, "Sharknado". The latest piece of sooooo-f***ing-bad-I'll-pretend-to-like-it-so-I-can-appear-to-be-contrarian hipster media. Ah well. At least it gives those fags something to discuss at Starbucks over their 1400 calorie liquid desserts. -
[AL East Trade]: O's acquire K-Rod
Howard Roark replied to fatcowxlive's topic in Toronto Blue Jays Talk
Here's what will happen. Instead of reading the writing on the wall, we're going to roll with this group for the next two years, finish 5th in the East both of those years, and only THEN will they tear this thing down. For HIGHLY denuded returns, mind you, as by then most if not all of our valued assets will be gone/expiring/declining. For marketing purposes, the rebuild will be delayed by two years. Enjoy the next two seasons of being a .500 ballclub with a mediocre farm. -
Because we're clearly going to roll with a 10-man bullpen next year once everyone's healthy.
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I'll go fill the jerry can with diesel. #TankThisTeam
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Ugh. Our overworked bullpen is only leading to lessened trade values for our relievers who AA won't even trade anyway. I enjoyed all the hand-signs and bicep flexes and whatnot tonight, those guys really earned it. What happens if they get above .500, impromptu orgy in the dugout after every extra-base hit?
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The trick is to enjoy it both ways; if they win, great, you're a Jays fan and obviously enjoy seeing them win. If they lose, great, better draft pick and it lights a fire under ownership/management for 2014.