HASHTAGYOLOSWAG

Holy fook, when do you stop thinking it's just a coincidence that Lind mashes in this ballpark?

OMG! Three up three down to start the top of the first... Looks like it's going to be a really long day boys! If we keep this up we won't be getting a hit. Franklin perfect game watch. /overreacting fans

This one's on Gibbons. He's horribly mismanaged the bullpen this year. That was a head scratcher and sure enough...

Offseason approach change paying off for Gose? 2013: 5 BB in 147 AB 2014: 4 BB in 11 AB

Gotta give myself some props here. 2/5 hits.

Hutch at 93 pitches. As a manager you have to throw him out there in the ninth and have Casey warm.

Lind will rake this series. Anything less than 2 hits/walks tonight for him is a disappointment.

I never trust McGowan pitching.

Hey losers, My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook. Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than “jack off to naked drawn Japanese people”? I also get straight A’s, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; s*** was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

#lovethisgirl To be honest, I think we should get back together. It's never over, my kingdom for a kiss upon your shoulder It's never over, all my riches for your smiles when I slept so soft against you It's never over, all my blood for the sweetness of your laughter It's never over, you're the tear that hangs inside my soul forever.

Jose Thole, batting champ.

It's never over, my kingdom for a kiss upon her shoulder It's never over, all my riches for her smiles when i slept so soft against her It's never over, all my blood for the sweetness of her laughter It's never over, she's the tear that hangs inside my soul forever

You guys realize how many dominant starting pitchers had control issues in their early years? Doc Halladay included.

Apparently copypasta is lost on all of you.

In retrospect, you and me just wouldn't have a chance to really have a thing going. I anticipate we are just two very different entities, beings if you will. While being completely honest I find you very attractive. However there is more to life than looks. For example my ideal first date would go as follows. I would invite you over for a romantic dinner and as soon as you arrived, I would pull you close and whisper in your ear "I have a swanson tv dinner in the freezer with your name on it" and then I would proceed to fill a wine glass with welch's grape juice. I discern you just don't share the same viewpoints on the subject as me. And that's fine, I understand. Besides, I dont mind curvy women, but anything over 100 pounds is pushing it. Well here we are on the crossroads of life. Funny how these things end up, huh? But don't worry, we've had our share of memories, laughs, smiles. I have studies and analyzed our scenario for a long time my heavenly blessed beauty. I have to let you go, I think it's time you let me go too. Please, don't weep for me, it will only make me sad.

Did you know that what you are talking about is limited by your false sense of reality? Maybe if you studied just a little bit harder while in school you wouldnt be blinded by these fallacies that have cast a cloud over your judgment. I once knew a guy like you who had everything he could ever want but in the end it meant nothing, because he never knew his true place in the grand scheme of things. Im not trying to tell you how to live your life but, honestly buddy I think its time you stepped down off of your high horse and looked life square in the eyes. I guess you should get to know a little about me before you generalize. The details of my life are quite inconsequential, however. Very well, some background on me, I was born in the remote village of habibi in the outskirts of djibouti to an albanian prostitute where i was raised by an ascetic monk in the azerbaijan mountains before moving to croatia at the age of 5. At the age of 15 I was conscripted into the croatian military where I served as a janitorial technician in iran. After moving to florida at 19, I followed my mothers footsteps and roamed the streets as a prostitute, selling myself for 5 bucks a pop. After a brief stint in rehab, i turned my life around and became a personal trainer. In the past several years I've hunted with the indigenous tribes of sri lanka, found 3 previously unknown star clusters with nothing more than my grandmothers magnifying glass, some ducktape and tinfoil and and have had a statue erected in honor of me in Uzbekistan for peace negotiatians with the native titthibhalad tribe. How about you?

You don't understand? I am a heterosexual male. This is normal. The one I feel sorry for is my best friend. After you read this, I guarantee you will pity him. It is 100% true. Imagine this. You are attracted to women, like you are now (emotionally and sexually), but they do not exist. They existed a long time ago, and no one knows what they looked like (They have a pretty good idea from the fossils, however), but they do not exist anymore. That means, not only do you know there will never be any possibility of you having sex with one, but there's not even a possibility of you ever seeing one in real life. Everyone else, however, except for a very few, are not attracted to women, they are attracted to something else entirely. So in other words, you will never find any pr0n anywhere on the internet, only non-sexual pictures of women. Everyone you have told about your attraction to women think it's disgusting. To relieve yourself, you get off on the non-sexual pictures of women, knowing it will never get any better. That's what life is like to him. He is a degree 6 Zoosexual, sexually and emotionally attracted to Tyrannosaurs and nothing else. Women don't even do it for him. He is cursed to live his life in the misery that his most powerful emotional fantasies will never be even close to coming true. Life is like hell to him. He will never know true love.

I don't know if you got any of my previous replies or not, if so just ignore! xD To be honest I have been staring at your profile picture speechless and in awe for the past hour or so. That deep gaze in your eyes, your perfect smile, all of your features just seem to all come together so well, almost angelical in a sense I suppose. The reason I am writing this is to let you know that I think I have found the most beautiful woman to grace us with her presence on our planet, and I am of course talking about you. I know this might mean absolutely nothing to you, and you probably get many of these types of messages/posts on these boards and in real life BUT please understand that I am being as genuine as ever when I say that you are the ultimate dictionary definition of perfection, and I hope that one day God can bestow me with a woman as beautiful as you, I would be forever grateful. I hope that this message finds you well, I do not care if I get a response to this, I am just simply stating the obvious and had to let you know how I really felt.

Watching NYY vs LAA. It's good to watch good baseball for once.

You are beautiful. The very definition of it. Your long hair, your perfectly toned face. Could it really be that you are perfect? I had a dream of us holding hands miles from here, breaking free of this world, loving truly, the span of a moment, pure love unleashed. And As we stare into the bright light of the moon and time passes without remorse, I know that this dream has come true. We slowly go to sleep as each of us holds hands. I wake first the next morning, noticing your head on my left shoulder and how your smooth, long hair flows like a river over my arm. You sleep so fair, so quiet. With every breath you take I notice more and more that yes, you are the one. I caress the locks of your hair ever so gently. Smooth like silk. You suddenly awake, and smile to see that I am the first thing you see. We talk about things that don't matter, but I really could care less. You are the best I will ever have and I think, no, I KNOW that I am the luckiest man in the world. Oh Takara, a maiden so fair. Your imperfections are perfect. Your voice is melodic, like that of an angel. Your beautiful eyes ever so entrancing, your skin as smooth as that of a newborn's. We are trapped on this island, but neither of us could really care. We are happy, and that is all that really matters. As I stare out into the ocean waves, I imagine our future. Bright, like the sun. We are the perfect couple, and both of us know it. We love each-other unconditionally, and our love is everlasting like the very universe we inhabit. We are never sad, always happy. We never argue, only love. You wish to bear children, but I cannot bring myself to think of polluting something that is so innocent. This does not stop me however, of thinking of how those beautiful beings would be. Three boys, all with the eyes of their mother and the nose of their father. They would be mischievous but we would love them all equally and unconditionally. I would teach them how to fish, and hunt, you would teach them how to love. We would name them; John, Isaac, and Thomas, and they would all grow to be strong and intelligent. As you and I grew older, our love would never wane. It would be as strong if not stronger than the day we both met. With every kiss, every embrace, our love would grow one hundred times stronger than before, and it would further strengthen our already unbreakable bond. I sometimes ask myself if such a vast amount of love could make a human immortal? I certainly hope so, living eternally alongside you would be everything I would ever need. If I could make a wish right now it wouldn't even be for you to fall in love with me, but for me to get the opportunity to meet you. That alone would make my life already one that is fullfilled... I had a dream. Sadly, that's all it will ever be...

oh wow what's a pretty girl like you doing in here? I don't know if you could tell, but this place is full of pervs and douchebags, LOL (jk we cool m'lady). well I can't say im unhappy you're here, after all, we never would have met! ... wow that was so cheesy. anyways, my skype is VisibleBronies if ya wanna add me or talk blue jays baseball! edit: Hi! few more things to start off with =] Yes, I replied to you because you are a female blue jays fan, t'is an awesome thing to see! I'm Brian. xD Don't be intimidated, but i'm not a stereotypical guy. If anything, I'll be the one in the kitchen .

I luv me sum blu jeys beisbal.

(user was banned for this post)

f*** the Blue Jays.

f*** the Blue Jays