You're really not being consistent, though. "I don't condone drilling a guy with a fastball but that's also just a thing that's done in baseball, so accept it and move on." So f***ing what if that's how it's been done? Hard slides into second are also "how it's been done" but you rightfully aren't ok with them still happening.
No, retaliation is stupid because it's childish and dangerous. "My feelings are hurt so I'll hit you with a fastball" is not normal behaviour. You can say "well that's baseball" but that still doesn't make it right.
Nah, the end of it should have been the bat flip. Don't like it, get him out next time.